5 Habits That Make Anxiety Worse During the Holidays (And How to Break Them)
Dec 3, 2021
The Holidays Are Here — and If You’re Feeling More Tense Than Joyful, You’re Not Alone
The holidays are here, and while part of you wants to feel joyful and at ease, another part feels tense, tired, and overstretched.
If you’re a high-achieving woman with high-functioning anxiety, this season can bring a unique kind of pressure—not because you’re doing anything wrong, but because the expectations, pace, and emotional load tend to amplify everything you already manage year-round.
Instead of feeling rested, you might find yourself moving faster, thinking harder, and trying to keep everyone else happy while ignoring your own needs.
You're not alone. And you're not imagining it: certain habits make holiday anxiety significantly worse.
Let’s break down the five habits that quietly intensify anxiety during the holidays, and how to interrupt each one so you can move through the season feeling more grounded and in control.
1. Saying Yes to Everything (Even When You're Overly Stressed)
High-functioning women are known for being capable, dependable, and the ones who “hold everything together.”
But during the holidays, this often becomes:
✓ Saying yes before you even think
✓ Agreeing to host when you’re already stretched thin
✓ Taking on extra responsibilities “because someone has to”
✓ Overcommitting to events, gatherings, or school activities
✓ Doing emotional labor for everyone else
Why it makes your anxiety worse:
Every yes takes time, energy, and emotional bandwidth. When you say yes without checking in with yourself, you gradually drain your internal resources—creating the perfect storm for overwhelm, irritability, and anxiety spikes.
A healthier shift:
Before saying yes, ask yourself: “Does this align with the holiday season I actually want this year?”
It’s a simple question that pulls you out of obligation and back into intention—so you can choose from clarity rather than pressure.
2. Over-planning and Trying to Make Everything Perfect
The holidays tend to bring out hidden perfectionistic tendencies:
→ Curating the perfect home
→ Masterminding every detail
→ Controlling how others will experience the holidays
→ Rewriting to-do lists over and over
→ Putting pressure on yourself to create magical moments for everyone
Why it makes your anxiety worse:
Perfectionism activates your nervous system. It creates pressure, activates self-criticism, and sets standards that are impossible to meet.
Reality will never match the ideal — and that gap fuels anxiety.
A healthier shift:
Let “good enough” be the goal.
Ask yourself:
💭 “What will actually matter in two weeks?”
💭 “What can I simplify?”
💭 “Where can I lower the bar and still enjoy the moment?”
3. Ignoring Body Cues
Many high-achieving women move through December like they’re running a marathon on fumes. You might notice yourself:
✓ Skipping meals or eating irregularly
✓ Staying up late to catch up or “get ahead”
✓ Drinking more alcohol at social events
✓ Pushing through exhaustion
✓ Ignoring signs of overstimulation or burnout
✓ Taking care of everyone else before yourself
Why it makes your anxiety worse:
When you override your body, your nervous system stays in a constant state of activation. Without rest, nourishment, or regulation, your body becomes more sensitive to stress — making anxiety louder, sharper, and harder to soothe.
A healthier shift:
Honor basic needs: sleep, nutrition, hydration, exercise and downtime.
Even small choices — like stepping away for a 3-minute grounding break — can reduce cortisol and restore emotional stability.
4. Avoiding Hard Conversations and Setting Zero Boundaries
The holidays tend to bring complicated family dynamics to the surface. Many women avoid boundaries to “keep the peace,” such as:
✓ Saying nothing when you’re uncomfortable
✓ Staying longer than you want
✓ Taking comments personally
✓ Feeling responsible for managing everyone’s emotions
✓ Not asking for help
✓ Agreeing to plans that drain you
Why it makes your anxiety worse:
Avoidance creates internal conflict.
What you avoid externally gets louder internally — leading to resentment, overwhelm, and emotional shutdown.
A healthier shift:
Start with simple, compassionate boundaries:
→ “I can only stay for an hour.”
→ “I’m not discussing that topic today.”
→ “I need help with this part.”
Boundaries don’t push people away — they allow you to stay connected without abandoning yourself.
5. Constant Comparison (Especially on Social Media)
Holiday content online is a highlight reel wrapped in perfection:
+ Perfect families
+ Perfect homes
+ Perfect outfits
+ Perfect trips
+ Perfect traditions
For women with high-functioning anxiety, this comparison hits hard. It silently reinforces:
→ “I’m not doing enough.”
→ “Everyone else is happier.”
→ “Our holidays should look more like theirs.”
→ “My kids deserve more.”
→ “I should be more present, calm, joyful…”
Why it makes your anxiety worse:
Comparison creates pressure. It disconnects you from your own values, your own pace, and your own lived experience.
A healthier shift:
Limit social media consumption this month — or unfollow accounts that spike self-criticism.
Refocus on what feels meaningful, not what looks impressive.
You’re Not Failing — You’re Overloaded and Trying to do Too Much
If the holidays feel overwhelming, it’s not a personal flaw. High-functioning anxiety makes you push harder, take on more, and internalize stress in ways that most people will never see.
When you learn to:
→ Set better personal boundaries
→ Lower the bar
→ Slow down
→ Soothe your nervous system
→ Release the perfectionism
→ Listen to your body
…your holidays (and your life) start to feel different — lighter, calmer, and more spacious.
If You're Ready to Feel More Grounded and Supported This Season, or when the new year starts…
I’m here for you. I offer specialized support and personalized programs in both my 1:1 coaching and therapy options designed specifically for high-achieving women who are ready to create real, lasting change.
If you’re craving more calm, clarity, better control over your emotions and a new level of ease through your days, book a free call → Schedule a Complimentary Consult
And if you’re not already part of my community, make sure you join my email list. It’s where I share exclusive tools, stories, strategies, and guidance to help you quiet your mind, release perfectionism, and feel more like yourself again. Your next step toward a more grounded, peaceful season can start right now.